There is a little scrawny dog that lives in my “hood” here in France.  It exists on the second floor of the complex.  I live in a sort of Melrose type place where all the patios and terraces face on another.  And, wouldn’t you know it, the charming owner has taken it upon herself to leave that filthy mutt on the patio the entire day every day.

 Now normally this would not bother me because, who is home during the day?  Well, this unemployed house wife is for the moment, so I get to listen to that little creep all day.  I tried to get a picture for you, here is what I got.  Hard to see the dirty mutt but the neighbors were watching so I had to go quick and he was hiding behind the chair, click on the photo for a better look:  

Now, I guess it could be worse right?  It could be a bad kid, or two, that I had to put up with right?  Oh, wait, I forgot to mention that they live directly across from us, one floor up.  God bless the mother.  I would have killed not one, but both of those children if they were mine.  Augh.  And, what’s great it, she is a flash back to an era long gone in the United States, smoking moms.  Don’t see those much any more do you?  This one has a cigarette going at all times, unless she has a kid or some laundry in her hands.  Then it’s in her mouth.  I guess I would take to the bottle so I can’t really blame her.  Here is a picture of the screamers house through the window of my guest bedroom.

This brings me to a another petty thing here that is slightly annoying.  To the tourist they might even be barely noticable let alone interuptive.   First, there is dog poop everywhere, watch out!  You would think that people would take note of their dogs pooping in the middle of side walks and “walk” there dogs elsewhere, but not here.  I have heard they have adopted the “baggy” system in Paris, but that’s poo-poo here.

And while we are on the subject of pooping, I can tell you, for the first time, in all my time of traveling abroad, I came across a “toliet” that was actually just a hole in the ground.  What was most fascinating to me was, not that it was in a gigantic mega grocery store, but that there were three perfectly normal, flush-able toilets in the bathroom.  Mind you they didn’t have a traditional seat but a toilet none the less.  Who in their right mind chooses the hole??? 

Of course I left immediately, ran to my husband and asked, how on earth does a woman pee in one of these things?  To which her responed “Uh, I don’t know…”.  But then again he doesn’t know much about “girl stuff” in general.  I am dying to figure this one out.

And while we are flushing out the toilets here I might mention they are a bit different.  Some come equipped with two buttons.  Usually one bigger than the other.  And you guessed it, the small one is for “smaller jobs” and the bigger one is for “bigger jobs”.  We have one of these at our house.  Nice.  Very convenient.  I can say this, you want to give her a few pushes extra every once in a while because the idea here is not to “flush” so much as it is to bring clean water in.  I learned this after living here for a few days wondering why the bathroom never smelled all that great.  Now I just flush for fun. 

I found some interesting Toilet blogs while researching this subject.  For those of you who are “sensitive” to the subject, avoid the ”krapper” link.  It’s not for you.  I hope I don’t offend too many of you.  Webber I added the special link for you.  Check out some of this great toilet humor!

http://wheresthetoilet.blogspot.com/, http://www.saynotocrack.com/  or for the less sensitive types http://thekrapper.blogspot.com/

So, I gotta run, it time to flush!

Interested in finding out more about flushing in France or just want to get educated, check out this article.  http://gofrance.about.com/od/travelplanning/ht/toilet.htm If you do decide to read the article pay attention to the note about men and women sharing bathrooms.  It happens a lot so don’t be surprised.

Oh, and carry those little handy wipes just in case!

And one last thing, get use to saying toilet.   It’s universally understood.

Ciao~